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    paul rudnick Quotes

    Most gay bashers will be wearing what gay people had on four years earlier - only in polyester with a Penney's label.
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: people  gay  year 
     
    I was once all by myself in a house on Fire Island. Where I compared the original cast recordings of two different versions of The Wild Party. A helicopter should have descended and taken me away to a gay penal colony. But of course, I was already there.
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: fire  wild  gay 
     
    I think people who make checklists are the most miserable and alone because they are looking for the perfect Entenmann's that is delicious and has no calories. Please, you want a brunette with a sense of humor, a doctorate and HIV-negative status? Good luck, honey. Love isn't so frequent that you can put conditions on it.
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: humor  people  alone  luck  honey 
     
    Because there's a clock attached to every beautiful woman. From the second she comes into her own, she begins to decline, because she begins to age. Aging is every beautiful woman's kryptonite. And so, yes, it's ridiculous and no, you don't have much time and of course it's not fair. Those three statements are the essence of beauty.
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: beauty  time  women  beautiful  age  aging 
     
    And so I continue in borderline poverty, save for my one indulgence, no, my single absolute necessity: I take cabs. Yes, on occasion, when I wish to see what people with unpleasant skin conditions are wearing, I do take the subway. I have never, I am proud to say, taken the bus, because people who take the bus have given up.
    — Paul Rudnick
    I believe in a benevolent God not because He created the Grand Canyon or Michelangelo, but because He gave us snacks.
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: believe  god 
     
    The only thing I have ever been asked [by a pollster] was the age at which I first indulged in oral sex (which, since it was a Yale Daily News poll, meant kissing).
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: age  sex 
     
    I just saw Titanic, which is a $200 million film about a real-life disaster at sea, but according to Hollywood Logic, none of the actual passengers was interesting enough, so the writer-director had to invent a Romeo and Juliet-style fictional couple to heat up the catastrophe. This seems a tiny bit like giving Anne Frank a wacky best friend, to perk up that attic.
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: friends  logic  giving  film  invent 
     
    I never got that show - Les Miz. It's about the French guy, right, who steals a loaf of bread, and then he suffers for the rest of his life. For Toast. Get over it!
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: right 
     
    If God didn't want you to have it, He would never have let you see it.
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: god 
     
    I just hate that gay role models are supposed to be just like straight people, as if even straight people are like that.
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: people  hate  gay 
     
    I love [my parents], but what if I could really talk to them? I mean, what if they had some answers? Or would that just be too weird?
    — Paul Rudnick
    According to Hollywood logic, none of the actual Titanic passengers was interesting enough, so the writer-director had to invent a Romeo and Juliet-style fictional couple to heat up the catastrophe. This seems a tiny bit like giving Anne Frank a wacky best friend, to perk up that attic.
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: friends  logic  giving  invent 
     
    Dysmorphia is when someone looks in the mirror, and sees something else. While I studied my own whatever I was, I decided that maybe everyone has at least a touch of dysmorphia; maybe it's impossible for anyone to ever truly know what they look like.
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: impossible 
     
    There is only one blasphemy, and that is the refusal to experience joy.
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: joy  experience 
     
    Most convicted felons are just people who were not taken to museums or Broadway musicals as children.
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: children  people  child 
     
    As a writer, I need an enormous amount of time alone. Writing is 90 percent procrastination: reading magazines, eating cereal out of the box, watching infomercials. It's a matter of doing everything you can to avoid writing, until it is about four in the morning and you reach the point where you have to write. Having anybody watching that or attempting to share it with me would be grisly.
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: time  alone  writing  reading  write  shares 
     
    Writing is 90% procrastination. It is a matter of doing everything you can to avoid writing, until it is about four in the morning and you reach the point where you have to write.
    — Paul Rudnick
    Writing is 90 percent procrastination: reading magazines, eating cereal out of the box, watching infomercials.
    — Paul Rudnick
    tags: writing  reading 
     
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