•   Loading... Please wait
  • Search
      Authors  

    p. g. wodehouse Quotes

    Alcohol is a misunderstood vitamin.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: alcohol 
     
    I'm not absolutely certain of the facts, but I rather fancy it's Shakespeare who says that it's always just when a fellow is feeling particularly braced with things in general that Fate sneaks up behind him with the bit of lead piping.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: fate  facts 
     
    It has been well said that an author who expects results from a first novel is in a position similar to that of a man who drops a rose petal down the Grand Canyon of Arizona and listens for the echo.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: men  novel  author 
     
    One of the poets, whose name I cannot recall, has a passage, which I am unable at the moment to remember, in one of his works, which for the time being has slipped my mind, which hits off admirably this age-old situation.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: time  work  moment  mind  poet 
     
    One of the drawbacks to life is that it contains moments when one is compelled to tell the truth.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: truth  moment 
     
    Unlike the male codfish which, suddenly finding itself the parent of three million five hundred thousand little codfish, cheerfully resolves to love them all, the British aristocracy is apt to look with a somewhat jaundiced eye on its younger sons.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: eyes  son  parent 
     
    It is true of course, that I have a will of iron, but it can be switched off if the circumstances seem to demand it.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: true 
     
    As Shakespeare says, if you're going to do a thing you might as well pop right at it and get it over.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: right 
     
    The voice of Love seemed to call to me, but it was a wrong number.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: wrong 
     
    An apple a day, if well aimed, keeps the doctor away.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: doctor 
     
    The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: right  wrong 
     
    Some minds are like soup in a poor restaurant-better left unstirred.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: poor  mind 
     
    I always strive, when I can, to spread sweetness and light. There have been several complaints about it.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    Sober or blotto, this is your motto: keep muddling through.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    A melancholy-looking man, he had the appearance of one who has searched for the leak in life's gas-pipe with a lighted candle.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: men 
     
    There is no surer foundation for a beautiful friendship than a mutual taste in literature.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    As we grow older and realize more clearly the limitations of human happiness, we come to see that the only real and abiding pleasure in life is to give pleasure to other people.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    I always advise people never to give advice.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: people  advice 
     
    Always get to the dialogue as soon as possible. I always feel the thing to go for is speed. Nothing puts the reader off more than a big slab of prose at the start.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    Everything in life that's any fun, as somebody wisely observed, is either immoral, illegal or fattening.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: fun 
     
    Chumps always make the best husbands. When you marry, Sally, grab a chump. Tap his head first, and if it rings solid, don't hesitate. All the unhappy marriages come from husbands having brains. What good are brains to a man? They only unsettle him.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: brain  marriage  marry 
     
    Every author really wants to have letters printed in the papers. Unable to make the grade, he drops down a rung of the ladder and writes novels.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: novel  write  author 
     
    I am told by those who know that there are six varieties of hangover-the Broken Compass, the Sewing Machine, the Comet, the Atomic, the Cement Mixer and the Gremlin Boogie, and his manner suggested that he had got them all.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: broken  machine 
     
    What's the use of a great city having temptations if fellows don't yield to them?
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: temptation 
     
    One of the Georges - I forget which - once said that a certain number of hours´ sleep each night - I cannot recall at the moment how many - made a man something which for the time being has slipped my memory.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: time  men  memory  sleep  moment  night 
     
    Well, why do you want a political career? Have you ever been in the House of Commons and taken a good square look at the inmates? As weird a gaggle of freaks and sub-humans as was ever collected in one spot.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: political 
     
    He had the look of one who had drunk the cup of life and found a dead beetle at the bottom.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    ...it has been well said that it is precisely these moments when we are feeling that ours is the world and everything that's in it that Fate selects for sneaking up on us with the rock in the stocking.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: fate  world  moment 
     
    I flung open the door. I got a momentary flash of about a hundred and fifteen cats of all sizes and colours scrapping in the middle of the room, and then they all shot past me with a rush and out of the front door; and all that was left of the mobscene was the head of a whacking big fish, lying on the carpet and staring up at me in a rather austere sort of way, as if it wanted a written explanation and apology.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: past  lying  cat 
     
    It was one of the dullest speeches I ever heard. The Agee woman told us for three quarters of an hour how she came to write her beastly book, when a simple apology was all that was required.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: women  speech  book  write 
     
    If men's minds were like dominoes, surely his would be the double blank.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: mind 
     
    I don't know if you have had the same experience, but the snag I always come up against when I'm telling a story is this dashed difficult problem of where to begin it.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    Freddie experienced the sort of abysmal soul-sadness which afflicts one of Tolstoy's Russian peasants when, after putting in a heavy day's work strangling his father, beating his wife, and dropping the baby into the city's reservoir, he turns to the cupboards, only to find the vodka bottle empty.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: work  father  wife 
     
    It's a funny thing about looking for things. If you hunt for a needle in a haystack you don't find it. If you don't give a darn whether you ever see the needle or not it runs into you the first time you lean against the stack.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: time  funny 
     
    Mike nodded. A sombre nod. The nod Napoleon might have given if somebody had met him in 1812 and said, "So, you're back from Moscow, eh?
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    She looked as if she had been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say 'when.'
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of the butterflies in the adjoining meadows.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: butterfly 
     
    Luck is a goddess not to be coerced and forcibly wooed by those who seek her favours. From such masterful spirits she turns away. But it happens sometimes that, if we put our hand in hers with the humble trust of a little child, she will have pity on us, and not fail us in our hour of need.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: children  trust  child  luck  spirit  fail 
     
    Unseen in the background, Fate was quietly slipping lead into the boxing-glove.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: fate 
     
    Golf... is the infallible test. The man who can go into a patch of rough alone, with the knowledge that only God is watching him, and play his ball where it lies, is the man who will serve you faithfully and well.
    — P. G. Wodehouse
    tags: men  lies  alone  god  golf 
     
  •   Loading... Please wait
  • Search

    Related Authors