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    howard stern Quotes

    I will never feel successful.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: successful 
     
    I think people of lesser talent will become stars.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: people  star  talent 
     
    I'm on the air five hours, and I blurt out anything in my head. Dangerous? Maybe.
    — Howard Stern
    I wanted to go hide. I wasn't looking to be more famous, I'm famous enough.
    — Howard Stern
    I feel blessed, I really feel fulfilled.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: blessed 
     
    I seem to be some sort of lightning rod. I just really irritate people, you know? I really do.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: people 
     
    These nutbags, like Santorum and Bachmann, who make these people and especially young gay kids feel miserable, shame on them. They're quacks. I would never vote for them. I wouldn't even listen to them because there but for the grace of God go they.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: people  young  grace  shame  gay  god  kids 
     
    I didn't listen to executives.
    — Howard Stern
    I'm going to take over the world. Everyone watch out, you're in big trouble.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: world 
     
    I'm not a good listener some times. I'm too much of a control freak. I'm learning to be better. I was so caught up in just getting the job done that I would miss out on the human aspect of this. There was a connection missing.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: time  human  control  job  learning  missing 
     
    I believe in censorship when it benefits me.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: believe 
     
    I'm sickened by all religions. Religion has divided people. I don't think there's any difference between the pope wearing a large hat and parading around with a smoking purse and an African painting his face white and praying to a rock.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: people  painting 
     
    Please, with the God talk. Hate to break it to you, but there is no God.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: hate  god 
     
    I don't think there's one thing I've ever said on the radio that would have been found indecent or obscene.
    — Howard Stern
    I'm for legalizing marijuana. Why pick on those drugs? Valium is legal. You just go to a doctor and get it and overdose on it - what's the difference? Prozac, all that stuff, so why not marijuana? Who cares? It's something that grows out of the ground - why not? Go smoke a head of cabbage. I don't care what you smoke.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: care  smoke  doctor 
     
    You've got to be a little vicious. You've got to be narcissistic. You've got to be on fire about your career.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: fire  career 
     
    Why be uptight about bowel movements and sex? We all have sex. We all have penises - except for those of us who have vaginas.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: sex 
     
    I am circumcised, and I tell you something, I despise it. I despise it. I despise it... I am completely pissed off that I'm circumcised.
    — Howard Stern
    I think I could create a cult, no problem. The hard part is getting people to kill themselves.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: people  problem 
     
    I've always been about honesty, whether on the radio, whether I did a movie, whether I wrote a book. As long as you're honest, you don't lose your edge.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: honesty  movie  book 
     
    We all get one life to live here. It's 2012, and for gay and lesbian couples who are in love, not to be able to be married is so absurd.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: live  gay  absurd 
     
    Talent is what drives this world ... Doesn't matter how many satellites you f--ing stick in the air.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: world  talent 
     
    I am completely pissed off that I'm circumcised.
    — Howard Stern
    I will never vote Democrat again, they are Communists.
    — Howard Stern
    I'm a parent, and I regulate what my kids listen to. I don't need the government to be the parent. If I'm a crappy parent, then I need the government involved.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: government  parent  kids 
     
    And rather than hide that, I would rather put that out on the radio and let someone see the full range of emotions. If you're going to be strong on the radio, you got to let it all out, even the ugly stuff. And you can't apologize for it.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: emotion  strong 
     
    Well, first of all, I'm worth every penny.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: worth 
     
    Late night television is ready for someone like me... standards have gone to an all-time low.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: night  gone  standard 
     
    Set about doing good to somebody. Put on your hat and go and visit the sick and poor of your neighborhood; inquire into their circumstances and minister to their wants. Seek out the desolate and afflicted and oppressed. . . I have often tried this method, and have always found it the best medicine for a heavy heart.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: heart  poor  medicine 
     
    I've always thought that a name says a lot about a person. So naturally, being named Howard, I always wanted to crawl into a hole.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: people  thoughts 
     
    I think I'm probably a little too desperate to be successful.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: successful 
     
    I don't like being 50 and I don't like thinking about death.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: death  thinking 
     
    Every time I went on the radio, I would take the crummiest radio station, the station that was like a toilet bowl. I would go on there and build up the ratings, so you couldn't do any worse.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: time  toilet 
     
    I'm not looking for a paycheck.
    — Howard Stern
    I've never come into anything successful before. I've always been hired by horrible radio stations with horrendous reputations and nothing to lose.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: successful 
     
    Here's what happens when you die-you sit in a box and get eaten by worms. I guarantee you that when you die, nothing cool happens.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: die 
     
    I'm about being funny. If I can make a joke using profanity, I will. But for the most part, that can get awfully old and boring.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: funny 
     
    When you hire me, you hire a nut who is going to work 24 hours a day for you and never, ever burn his audience.
    — Howard Stern
    tags: work 
     
    Most of the things I do are misunderstood. Hey, after all, being misunderstood is the fate of all true geniuses, is it not?
    — Howard Stern
    tags: fate  true 
     
    I believe I am doing the work for humanity. This show is so uplifting.
    — Howard Stern
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