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    carl hiaasen Quotes

    My father's a large man, very strong, but he says fighting is for people who can't win with their brains. He also says there are times when you've got no choice but to defend yourself from common morons.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    My father used to say that you live most of your life inside your own head, so make sure it's a good space.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: live  space  father 
     
    In his own mind, it was never a matter of courage. But courage it was.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: mind  courage 
     
    He wondered if something was mentally wrong with him for being content with what he had
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: wrong 
     
    Please don't grow up to be one of those men who lie for the sport of it, and most men do. That's a fact. That's why the world is so messed up, Noah. That's why history books are full of so much heartache, and tragedy. Politicians, dictators, kings, phoney-baloney preachers-most of 'em are men, and most of 'em lie like rugs
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: men  world  lies  tragedy  facts  book  heartache 
     
    That's what people do when they find a special place that wild and full of life, they trample it to death.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: death  people  wild 
     
    Sunset on the water ought to be a quiet and easy time, but I guess some people can't stand a little silence.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: time  people  silence  water 
     
    The evening news made her wonder if God was dead; the morning sun made her believe He wasn't.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: believe  wonder  god 
     
    Sometimes you're going to be faced with situations where the line isn't clear between what's right and what's wrong.Your heart will tell you to do one thing and your brain will tell you to do something different. In the end, all that's left is to look at both sides and go with your best judgment.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: heart  right  brain 
     
    The first rule of hurricane coverage is that every broadcast must begin with palm trees bending in the wind.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: rules 
     
    All novels are about crime. You'd be hard pressed to find any novel that does not have an element of crime. I don't see myself as a crime novelist, but there are crimes in my books. That's the nature of storytelling, if you want to reflect the real world.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    I've always enjoyed making people laugh. But in order for me to be funny, I have to get ticked off about something.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: people  funny 
     
    Humor can be an incredible, lacerating and effective weapon.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: humor 
     
    From my experience, politicians are much more uncomfortable being made fun of than they are being preached at and screeched at - you know, and the soapbox routine. They're much more uneasy knowing they're a target of ridicule.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: experience  knowing  fun 
     
    My humour has always come from anger, but I have to make sure I don't just get angry and jump on a soapbox.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: humour  anger 
     
    I don't have an e-reader. One reason is that I like to dog-ear the page when I find a particularly good sentence or passage.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    There is no writer's block in a newsroom. There's only unemployment block.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    Good satire comes from anger. It comes from a sense of injustice, that there are wrongs in the world that need to be fixed. And what better place to get that well of venom and outrage boiling than a newsroom, because you're on the front lines.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: world  anger  satire  wrong 
     
    There's this false notion that this is a regional phenomenon, when in fact every state in the union has hardcore rednecks. No exceptions.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: facts 
     
    My escape is to just get in a boat and disappear on the water.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: water 
     
    Unfortunately for novelists, real life is getting way too funny and far-fetched.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: funny  real 
     
    No deliberative body is manifestly less qualified to make decisions about public education than our state Legislature. With a few shining exceptions, most of these clowns don't read, can't write, and clearly can't add.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: body  decision  education  write  read 
     
    The greatest sin for a writer is to be boring.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: sin 
     
    I've never progressed very far from my days as a smart aleck in middle school.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: smart  school 
     
    As frightening as this may sound, what you see in the books is the way I see the world. And so far I haven't seen anything, either in Florida or elsewhere, to dissuade me from it.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: world  book 
     
    Everybody's idea of a great book is different, of course. For me it's one that makes my jaw drop on every page, the writing is so original.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: writing  book  ideas 
     
    A bonus, being a writer, is that the true- life source material is fabulously bizarre. There's so much corruption, violence and free-floating depravity that the well never runs dry, whether you're a novelist, a journalist, or both.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: violence 
     
    If you write satire, the guilty pleasure these days is that there's just so much material about. On the other hand, if you have a family it can be depressing.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: satire  pleasure  write 
     
    My books are character- driven. They're not driven by the story,
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: stories  book 
     
    I never laugh or smile when I am writing. When I come home for lunch after writing all morning, my wife says I look like I just came home from a funeral. This is not bragging. This is an illness.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: smile  illness  writing  wife 
     
    The one word that no politician will ever speak, is 'enough.' Enough.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    When I'm working on a novel of my own, I try to read mostly nonfiction, although sometimes I break down and peek at something else.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: novel  read 
     
    Obviously you have to make a profit to put out a newspaper. I'm not an idiot. But when the margins are in excess of 25 per cent you're talking about greed.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: greed  idiot 
     
    One problem with age is that patience begins to ebb.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: patience  age  problem 
     
    I love reality shows. The folks who dream up some of these concepts are either geniuses, or totally stoned.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    tags: reality  dreams 
     
    Actually it was the mark of the stupid, which is what you get for sitting under a tree during a thunderstorm.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    It's easy to get distracted by the vaudevillian aspects of the healthcare debate.
    — Carl Hiaasen
    Every writer scrounges for inspiration in different places, and there's no shame in raiding the headlines. It's necessary, in fact, when attempting contemporary satire. Sharp-edged humor relies on topical reference points.
    — Carl Hiaasen
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    carl hiaasen
    Birth    : March 12, 1953
    Occupation  : Journalist