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    bob newhart Quotes

    I think that what comes through in Chicago humor is the affection. Even though youre poking fun at someone or something, theres still an affection for it.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: humor  fun 
     
    All I can say about life is, 'Oh God, enjoy it!'
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: god 
     
    I wasn't much good. When I went into the line on a fake - I would holler 'I don't have it!'
    — Bob Newhart
    I am a minimalist. I like saying the most with the least.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: saying 
     
    I was influenced by every comedian I ever saw work. That's the only way you learn how to do it.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: work  learn 
     
    I was never a Certified Public Accountant. I just had a degree in accounting. It would require passing a test, which I would not have been able to do.
    — Bob Newhart
    But I really believe that if you have the ability, there is an obligation to make people laugh
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: people  believe 
     
    People with a sense of humor tend to be less egocentric and more realistic in their view of the world and more humble in moments of success and less defeated in times of travail.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: humor  time  people  world  moment  success 
     
    Marriage and fatherhood heighten the disillusion that we all think we are born handy. We confidently believe that we can fix things around the house, as if it's part of the collective brain that was further enhanced by eighth-grade shop class.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: believe  brain  marriage 
     
    I don't want to find the secret. I'm afraid all the joy will go out of it if I find the secret.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: secret  joy  afraid 
     
    I'm one of those passengers who arrives at the airport five or six hours early so I can throw back a few drinks and muster up the courage to board the plane. Apparently I'm not alone because I've never been in an empty airport bar. I don't care what time you get there. Even at 8:00 a.m. you have to fight your way to the bar. At that hour, everyone drinks Bloody Marys so no one can tell it's booze- at least until they fall off their chair.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: time  alone  fight  care  courage 
     
    I still feel thirty, except when I try to run.
    — Bob Newhart
    There's gratification in making somebody laugh. It's a wonderful sound. I find myself, to this day, doing it, wanting to make people laugh.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: people 
     
    I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down'.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: people  music 
     
    It's getting harder and harder to differentiate between schizophrenics and people talking on a cell phone. It still brings me up short to walk by somebody who appears to be talking to themselves.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: people 
     
    Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with it and then move on.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: laughter 
     
    I think you should be a child for as long as you can. I have been successful for 74 years being able to do that. Don't rush into adulthood, it isn't all that much fun.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: children  fun  child  successful  year 
     
    I think everyone probably starts out sounding like someone else, but gradually you develop your own sound.
    — Bob Newhart
    I don't have a show anymore. I don't have a check coming in every week. This is important to me, I got to score a million tonight or it could all be over.
    — Bob Newhart
    I feel more comfortable in comedy.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: comedy 
     
    The reason I'm a psychologist is based in part on my telephone routines. Much of my humor comes out of reaction to what other people are saying. A psychologist is a man who listens, who is sympathetic.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: humor  men  people  saying 
     
    You never know when you'll come upon something and it's going to be fodder for new material.
    — Bob Newhart
    I didn't need the elf outfit to play an elf; I could just play an elf.
    — Bob Newhart
    I can't remember the last live-action, non-animated Christmas movie.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: movie  christmas 
     
    As an actor, you generally want to see the other actor's face.
    — Bob Newhart
    Every new routine I have ever written and performed probably occurred extemporaneously. Then after you have fleshed it out and tried it out in front of a number of audiences and it works, you put it down on paper.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: work 
     
    Doormen are kind of invisible, people don't know their names. They just say, Thank you, or Good morning. I'd never thought about doormen before. They're a vanishing breed. More electronic doors are being introduced.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: people  thoughts 
     
    Women are more emotional. They do get flustered. Which is not to say that men are better than they. It's simply the way it is.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: men  women  emotional 
     
    Continuing to do stand-up is always a challenge because the audiences and the environments in which you work very often differ.
    — Bob Newhart
    I've done more than I thought I was ever going to do. I've had a very long and very satisfying career.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: thoughts  career 
     
    You shouldn't get too close to the truth, because then maybe you stop being funny.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: truth  funny 
     
    One of the first things that you learn as a stand-up is, you're the boss. It's your stage, and don't screw with me because I'll make you look bad, which I had to do, because you wind up with drunks and loud people.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: people  bad  learn 
     
    Stammering is different than stuttering. Stutterers have trouble with the letters, while stammerers trip over entire parts of a sentence. We stammerers generally think of ourselves as very bright. My own private theory is that stammerers have so many ideas swirling around their brains at once that they can't get them all out, though I haven't found any scientific evidence to back that up.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: brain  ideas 
     
    The best advice I could give someone trying to get into the comedy field is to take advantage of every opportunity you have to work to hone your skills.
    — Bob Newhart
    I couldn't play off people that I don't personally like.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: people 
     
    You may not think I'm a sex symbol, but I became a father at the age of 48. Now young people think of me as a mini-folk hero because it's difficult for them to believe a man of my age is sexually active.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: men  people  young  believe  age  hero  sex  father 
     
    The giant superstars are people whose talent is so enormous that their death wish can't destroy it.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: death  people  talent  wishes 
     
    One of the first things you ever learn as a stand-up is don't show fear.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: fear  learn 
     
    Don't ever have two dogs. That way you won't know which one to blame.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: dog 
     
    There's a lot of cynicism. Let's really enjoy Christmas, with all that's going on in the world.
    — Bob Newhart
    tags: world  christmas 
     
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